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Mriya Neo Bistro My culinary hotspot in South Ken Regales you with delicious gourmet food Inspired by my home country's dishes—when You've not proclaimed Ukraine to be the rude Aggressor in our war. The USA's New president, whose palate seems to lack Experience, may have no wish to graze On appetizing bryndza for a snack: Big Macs are more his style. But should he step Inside my bistro, he will not get fed, Since I will tell my loyal staff to schlep Trump out again for saying what he said Re Russia—Mriya Neo Bistro bans Offensive rhetoric by Putin fans! (First published in Light on 3rd March, 2025 as one of the Poems of the Week. Story here) |
A Ruddy Shelduck A ruddy shelduck is, in Buddhist lands, Revered. In Italy, this duck is deemed Untouchable. In Donald Junior's hands, Ducks have to be shot dead to be esteemed. Don wasn't sure what bird he had shot at, Yet bragged it was incredible to shoot So rare a waterfowl, implying that He'd bagged it, on Venetian game-pursuit Estate lands ... Then he learned the duck implies Legalities: to shoot it was a crime ... "Do you have proof I bagged it? Other guys, Uploading buckshot at the selfsame time, Confound the issue!" Don says now. "Though we Know someone shot it, who can prove it's me?" (First published on 17th March, 2025 in Oddball Magazine. Story here) |
Mouse To Mammoth? Mutations' permutations are the stuff Of evolution: if effects in mice Upscale to pachydermal size enough, Siberia becomes a paradise Enjoyed by mammoths, prophesize the guys That grew a golden fleece of woolly hair On quite colossal but non-mammoth-size Mouse guinea pigs. The scientists declare A hope: a mammoth calf is born in three More years of tinkering, if genes for fur Manipulate the hairless pedigree Of elephants ... From mouse to mammoth? Were They mammoth brains or woolly thinkers?—they Have only mice with woolly DNA! (First published on 31st March, 2025 in Oddball Magazine. Story here) |
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Oil On The Canvas O wad some Pow'r the giftie gie the C- In-C to see himself as others do: Less presidential than Barack, Joe B Or Dubya, and all predecessors too. No portrait can distort him if it paints The truly worst: oil on the canvas did Him justice, and his clamorous complaints Extol the artist capturing his id (Commissioned for the space his idol hung Awhile in). But her skill at portraits can Not match the gloss of portraitists among Vlad Putin's circle, who made MAGA Man Appear a thing of beauty ... O, wad he See what we see, resign, and set us free! (First published in Light on 31st March, 2025 as one of the Poems of the Week. Story here) |
No Worries If Not No less than fourteen times a day, a slew Of Brits (near half of us) use weasel words, Which is to say, we're mealy-mouthed—our view Of confrontation is: that's for the birds. Research may track our cowardice, though it Reveals no reason for our British way: Is mealy-mouthedness rife because a Brit Eats numerous digestives every day? "Sounds fun, I'll let you know" for "Sounds a bore, I won't be there" or "Maybe it's just me" For "You're the prob" and "No great hurry" for "Now urgent" bury what we disagree On sans unpleasantness ... You don't admit That's great? ... No worries if not fine with it! (First published in the Summer 2025 issue of WestWard Quarterly. Story here) |
In A Sausage Roll I represent the essence of you Brits No less than Attenborough, Princess Di And Shakespeare's waxworks: culinary wits Say what you eat is who you are, so I Am all you Brits in spades. You gobble me Up every day, a million times, in snacks— Spiced sausages in pastry, apt to be As flaky as your nature. Who would wax Greggs sausage rolls for cultural delight Except a Brit? Who else would mount a plaque Revering me, upon a plinth, and write On it that I'm a hero of a snack Lunch? Who, if not a Brit? ... Your nation's soul Loves British culture in a sausage roll! (First published on 4th August, 2025 in Oddball Magazine. Story here) |