Limericks Appearing in the Daily Mail

  Once a vicar set out to achieve
  Making viewers online all believe
  That the Light of the Lord
  Should be never ignored ...
  Which was true—it set fire to his sleeve!

  (Friday 27th March, 2020)
  There once was a time of anxiety
  When Thatcher regained notoriety
  The words of her song
  Were by Boris ruled wrong:
  There IS such a thing as society!

  (Tuesday 7th April, 2020)
  Once a doughty old Captain Tom Moore
  Thought the Health Service shouldn't be poor.
  So by circling his grounds
  Many million pounds
  Did he raise towards funding its cure!

  (Wednesday 29th April, 2020)
  "I'm as fit as a butcher's own dog!"
  Declared Boris, "not just 'cos I jog
  Or I push up my weight ...
  But because I'm up late
  Changing nappies and feeding the sprog!"

  (Thursday 2nd July, 2020)
  A Colombian frog yearned to roam,
  One that carried a Welsh chromosome.
  It rode five thousand miles
  Among Asda fruit piles
  And now Haverfordwest is its home!

  (Tuesday 21st July, 2020)
  Now to Windsor has Captain Tom been,
  'Twas a scene that had never been seen.
  To avoid Covid scare
  In the full open air
  Was our Tom made a knight by the Queen!

  (Thursday 23rd July, 2020)
  Once a selfie-mad tourist did dare
  On a sculpture to sprawl without care
  But he snapped off three toes
  Of a dame in repose
  And must pay for expensive repair!

  (Tuesday 11th August, 2020)

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