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In Utah, a mystery beckoned: How Russia by judges was reckoned To lose in ice skating But earn the gold rating ... While Canada won but came second! (Sunday 17th February, 2002 in the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel) |
Once a governor, name o' Rick Scott Said: A scientist's what I am not But I'll happily meet With you science elite ... Just to better ignore what you've got! (Sunday 20th July, 2014 in the Tallahassee Democrat) |
Now another four years of Rick Scott And Pam Bondi is what we have got .... But what's worse, it is plain Is enduring this pain In the absence of medical pot! (Thursday 6th November, 2014 in the Tallahassee Democrat) |
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Once a vicar set out to achieve Making viewers online all believe That the Light of the Lord Should be never ignored ... Which was true—it set fire to his sleeve! (Friday 27th March, 2020 in the Daily Mail) |
There once was a time of anxiety When Thatcher regained notoriety The words of her song Were by Boris ruled wrong: There IS such a thing as society! (Tuesday 7th April, 2020 in the Daily Mail) |
Once a doughty old Captain Tom Moore Thought the Health Service shouldn't be poor. So by circling his grounds Many million pounds Did he raise towards funding its cure! (Wednesday 29th April, 2020 in the Daily Mail) |
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"I'm as fit as a butcher's own dog!" Declared Boris, "not just 'cos I jog Or I push up my weight ... But because I'm up late Changing nappies and feeding the sprog!" (Thursday 2nd July, 2020 in the Daily Mail) |
A Colombian frog yearned to roam, One that carried a Welsh chromosome. It rode five thousand miles Among Asda fruit piles And now Haverfordwest is its home! (Tuesday 21st July, 2020 in the Daily Mail) |
Now to Windsor has Captain Tom been, 'Twas a scene that had never been seen. To avoid Covid scare In the full open air Was our Tom made a knight by the Queen! (Thursday 23rd July, 2020 in the Daily Mail) |
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Once a selfie-mad tourist did dare On a sculpture to sprawl without care But he snapped off three toes Of a dame in repose And must pay for expensive repair! (Tuesday 11th August, 2020 in the Daily Mail) |
Moaned the Donald: 'I lack perfect hair 'Cos my shower's a low-flow affair. With my shower turned on Half the water is gone'— But I think it's his hair that's not there! (Tuesday 18th August, 2020 in the Daily Mail) |
Once a loyal VP called Mike Pence, While debating in Donald's defence, So attracted a fly That you have to ask why— What's he full of that gives off such scents? (Tuesday 14th October, 2020 in the Daily Mail) |
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Once a driver whose train wouldn't stop And was poised for a perilous drop Owed his life to the tail Of a large sculptured whale When his train came to rest right on top! (Friday 6th November, 2020 in the Daily Mail) |
It's time for all Brits to redouble Their efforts against Covid trouble: They yearn to hug Gran But they worry their plan Will risk bursting her safe Christmas bubble. (Wednesday 23rd December, 2020 in the Daily Mail) |
Mused the Donald: New greatness I've reached. With my whale-size economy beached, I have done a swell job Of inciting the mob And I'm first to be doubly impeached! (Tuesday 19th January, 2021 in the Daily Mail) |