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Mused a snooker ace, Luca Brecel: I was hitting the cue ball so well, I gave practice a rest And I partied with zest— Now the trophy is in my hotel! (Wednesday 10th May, 2023 in the Daily Mail) |
Princess Anne, in row two, was preferred To Prince Harry, whose row was the third, Where her red feather plume Blocked his view of the room— Was she giving her nephew the bird? (Wednesday 31st May, 2023 in the Daily Mail) |
You play tunes in a black bearskin hat. Add a red woollen tunic to that. You are keeping the beat Till you faint in the heat, So the note that you end on is flat. (Friday 16th June, 2023 in the Daily Mail) |
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Subjecting the Kremlin to scrutiny, Concluding its war is too Putin-y And feeling empowered, A guy who's no coward Decided it's high time for mutiny. (Wednesday 28th June, 2023 in the Daily Mail) |
Though he's dropped an occasional catch, Jonny Bairstow's the man of the match. You protest? Jonny lopes To the boundary ropes After hoisting you up to dispatch! (Thursday 6th July, 2023 in the Daily Mail) |
The consumer who's shopping around Finds that prices at Poundland astound. But it's not that they're low It's wherever you go, There is nothing on sale for a pound! (Friday 21st July, 2023 in the Daily Mail) |
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Though the Ashes are doomed to remain Down in Oz, England's bid to regain Them, if not guaranteed, Was on track to succeed— Till washed out by the Manchester rain! (Wednesday 26th July, 2023 in the Daily Mail) |
Rishi Rishi Sunak's not apt to careen Into U-turns on tramlines between Streets in Manchester and Hubs for airplanes to land— If they opened in Twenty Fourteen! (Monday 16th October, 2023 in Oddball Magazine) |
Snoot Second-snoot genes ensure that their sprog's Not much plagued by the sniffles: this mog's Out of tube to breathe through Only if both her two Treasured snoots have olfactory clogs! (Monday 6th November, 2023 in Oddball Magazine) |
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Starfish experts once knowingly said, Starfish seem to be lacking a head. Then they mapped starfish genes ... Their analysis means Stars are head and no body instead! (Friday 10th November, 2023 in the Daily Mail) |
Even devils seem less sharply horned When Suella is mad. So be warned: As I've often heard tell, There's no fury in Hell Like a former Home Office chief scorned! (Tuesday 28th November, 2023 in the Daily Mail) |
Brits Britain's leading the world with the fat Raft of Japanese street litter that It picked up: Britain, prone To get trash-talked, has shown Stuff exists that Brits aren't rubbish at! (Monday 4th December, 2023 in Oddball Magazine) |
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Matt and Nigel both went down below For the I'm A Celebrity Show And were third—does it mean Politicians are seen As third rate by the voters who know? (Tuesday 19th December, 2023 in the Daily Mail) |
Idler Is Custard unwell? No, the crazy Dude's merely incredibly lazy— Laid dead in his spot Even though he is not Ready yet to help push up a daisy! (Monday 22nd January, 2024 in Oddball Magazine) |
The gait of a penguin is mainly Absurdly and plainly ungainly. But if, when it's icy, Your balance is dicey, It saves you from hurting insanely! (Wednesday 24th January, 2024 in the Daily Mail) |